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All children hate chores – adults hate them too, actually. But inherent in completing these dreaded tasks are skills and emotional messages that are conveyed that go far beyond taking out the garbage or emptying the dishwasher.
With homework beginning to dwindle over the next few weeks, it may be a good time to discuss and plan the chore chart and each person’s contribution to running your house. Although it’s helpful for us as parents to have another set of hands or two helping to take out the garbage or bring in the mail, our children are gaining a lot more than just points or allowance.
A Sense of Belongingness
When you introduce (or re-introduce) the chore chart in your home, you may want to call a family meeting and have a discussion about it. That is, present to your children that you are a team, a family. Each member in the home is an important and valuable contributor to how your house runs. When one person does not do their part, the rest of the system suffers. For example, not taking out the garbage means the cans are full and the odor is not fresh!
Over time, your child will begin to develop a sense of being a part of a community which will easily transfer to the classroom, boy/girl scouts, and sports. You won’t need to discuss the importance of being a team member only, but rather your child will have gained a deeper understanding of what that really means, and what happens when one person doesn’t do their part.
Building Executive Functioning Skills
Another benefit to our children having chores is that they begin to develop their executive functioning skills. A child may think about when they will empty the dishwasher around their homework or sports, for example. A child who is sorting laundry will need to maintain attention to the task, take a look at the clothing, make an assessment and follow through. And the more complex the task, the more executive functioning skills are used.
Stop! Collaborate and Listen
There are many approaches to creating a chore chart, but for me, it’s most important that the maintenance is easy so that the consistency in using it is possible. One easy way to create a system is to have your children create a list of chores that need to be done in the house to keep it running. They can then write those chores on popsicle sticks. Each completed chore can be turned into points or money value. Those points can then be translated into privileges (e.g., ice cream with mommy, movies with daddy, etc)
Each child can have their own jar or can in which they can choose (or can be assigned) 2, 3 or 5 chores per day (depending on age). Once chores are completed, the popsicle sticks go into their “Done” jar or can. At the end of the day, a parent can keep a log of the number of chores completed. Payment or privileges can then be provided at the end of the week.
Make it a collaborate approach. Learning to collaborate is a life skill that will enhance your child’s ability to negotiate and compromise. First, you may be thinking, what type of chores are appropriate for my child’s age.
Which Chores are Appropriate for My Child’s Age?
According to WebMD, the following is a suggested list of chores for your child by age.
Chores for children ages 2 to 3
- Put toys away
- Fill pet’s food dish
- Put clothes in hamper
- Wipe up spills
- Pile books and magazines
Chores for children ages 4 to 5
Any of the above chores, plus:
- Make their bed
- Empty wastebaskets
- Clear table
- Use hand-held vacuum to pick up crumbs
- Water flowers
- Unload utensils from dishwasher
- Wash plastic dishes at sink
- Fix bowl of cereal
Chores for children ages 6 to 7
Any of the above chores, plus:
- Sort laundry
- Sweep floors
- Set and clear table
- Help make and pack lunch
- Weed and rake leaves
- Keep bedroom tidy
Chores for children ages 8 to 9
Any of the above chores, plus:
- Load dishwasher
- Put away groceries
- Vacuum
- Help make dinner
- Make own snacks
- Wash table after meals
- Put away own laundry
- Sew buttons
- Make own breakfast
- Peel vegetables
- Cook simple foods, such as toast
- Mop floor
- Take pet for a walk
Chores for children ages 10 and older.
Any of the above chores, plus:
- Unload dishwasher
- Fold laundry
- Clean bathroom
- Wash windows
- Wash car
- Cook simple meal with supervision
- Iron clothes
- Do laundry
- Baby-sit younger siblings (with adult in the home)
- Clean kitchen
- Change their bed sheets
I bet you didn’t know that there were so many benefits to having a chore system in place in your home, huh? Well, the benefits far exceed a clean playroom or a made bed!